The Oklahoman
Oct 10, 2024
NORMAN — The conversation topics between Joe Castiglione and Chris Del Conte during a 10-hour road trip to Mississippi a few years ago were as vast as the deep south outside their car window.
The discussions between the closely bonded friends and rival athletic directors were so thought-provoking that, outside of a few hazardous vehicle mishaps, the drive through various forests and farmsteads felt like it lasted only an hour. The two have maintained high esteem for each other since first meeting in the late 1990s and speak daily.
At one point during the trip, the conversation turned to family history.
Del Conte’s grandparents were Italian immigrants. Castiglione, adopted as a child, thought he was Italian during his upbringing but never knew his biological parents.
“Have you ever done 23andMe?” Del Conte, Texas’ athletic director, asked Castiglione.
Castiglione’s wife, Kristen, had purchased an AncestryDNA test kit after his adoptive parents died. OU’s athletic director of 26 years wasn’t too keen on the idea, afraid of what he might find out so he never obliged.
“What happens if it comes back and I’m of a different nationality, or if my ethnic background is completely different than what I believed during my upbringing?” Castiglione told Del Conte. “I was brought up to think I was Italian in my background, what happens if I find out something different? I’m not sure I want to take the risk of having an identity crisis.”
Castiglione leapt. After leaving the envelope with the results sitting on his desk for days, he gave in, unsealed it and discovered through both the Ancestry and 23andMe tests he was more Italian than Del Conte, who was left shocked.
“When you think about how two people get to know each other and their background, all of that,” Castiglione told The Oklahoman, “it’s those things beyond sports that cement the relationship to be one for the ages.”
OU and Texas will compete for the 120th time in the rivalry’s history but first as the SEC’s newest members. The friends and rivals became partners in the decision that shifted the landscape of collegiate athletics when they decided to leave the Big 12.
When Castiglione and Del Conte’s programs meet at 2:30 p.m. Saturday inside the old Cotton Bowl, the game will be fiercely competitive. They don’t speak in-game when their schools are competing in any sport.
But on Friday, when the two meet up at the State Fair of Texas so Castiglione can indulge in his yearly food rituals, and sometime in the 24 to 72 hours postgame when emotions cool, they’ll go back to being thick as thieves. When they sign off phone calls they tell the other they love them. Kristen and Robin, Del Conte’s wife, have also become friends.
“We’re very close,” Del Conte told The Oklahoman. “It’s more like a brother relationship to me.”
Friendship doesn’t come without its fair share of debates and banter. Del Conte is a self-proclaimed “person that’s ready, fire, aim at all times,” while Castiglione takes a more contrarian view on issues.
The other day, Del Conte logged onto a Zoom call with Castiglione and colleagues. Castiglione was already leading the group through various possibilities on a singular topic.
“If you told Joe the sky is blue, he would want to dissect every answer of why it’s blue, it doesn’t make a difference,” Del Conte said. “It’s the best. He will go down 19 rabbit holes to come back with an answer, and that’s the greatest thing I appreciate about him: There’s no stone unturned. When he’s going to make a decision, he deliberates over every thought.
“That’s what makes Joe great.”
It’s one reason why Del Conte has sought Castiglione’s guidance through nearly every career decision.
The two leaders of major SEC athletic departments hold a similar worldview. They’re both not afraid to make unconventional decisions — like switching conferences, which altered the landscape of college athletics — and criticism doesn’t deter them. It’s part of their DNA.
“We have a deep commitment to our core values, starting with integrity,” Castiglione said. “That’s why we’re so close because I know he does things the right way, he knows I will do things the right way and we’ll always stand for doing things the right way.”
‘Preserving the rivalry’
Castiglione and Del Conte showcased their affinity for each other to a national audience earlier this year on a beach in Destin, Florida.
Both athletic directors’ phones wouldn’t stop buzzing with text messages about how funny the two were during their joint appearance on “The Paul Finebaum Show” at the SEC’s annual spring meetings. They discussed how they decided on the SEC move, with Del Conte first suggesting it and the two arguing back and forth briefly before phoning commissioner Greg Sankey.
But Castiglione and Del Conte had been having similar conversations daily for years. Nothing was different.
“It’s the way it comes out,” Castiglione said. “It’s natural.”
Castiglione and Del Conte studied the landscape of the college football industry during the COVID-19 pandemic.
NIL was on the horizon and so was the end of the SEC and Big 12’s television deals.
Neither school would move from the Big 12 to the SEC without the other.
“It was critically important,” Del Conte said. “When looking at the national landscape and what was taking place, preserving the rivalry and the two schools in terms of the history, was always paramount in our conversations. (We’re) very fortunate that things worked out the way they did, and I’m truly excited about the game, but more importantly, navigating this time in college athletics where we were able to maintain our partnership.”
Every year, both eagerly anticipate this week. Castiglione and Del Conte each have functions with donors in Dallas on Thursday, Friday and Saturday, sometimes jointly.
But they make a point to get out and see the pomp and circumstance of the fair on Friday. Cotton Bowl Stadium, built 94 years ago, is undergoing renovations so they’ll check on its progress and meet with fair staff.
“Every conversation we’ve ever had about the general landscape, what has gotten lost is rivalries,” Del Conte said. “We talk about Oklahoma not playing Nebraska every year, I grew up watching that game. Texas playing Texas A&M. Rivalries are what make college athletics so great. The history, the pageantry and the preservation of those games mean so much to our fans.
“We’re very thankful that every decision and conversation we’ve ever had was always about preserving the rivalry.”
Infrastructure concerns with the fan amenities at the Cotton Bowl are real. Before it was undergoing the current project, the last time it was renovated was in 2008, which included an encircling of the second deck to expand capacity from 68,252 to 92,100 and adding a new scoreboard.
The renovations include the addition of 14 escalators, multi-story entries at the west entrance gates, an increase of the upper west concourse to three times the current square footage and an increase to the main concourse to double in size. Restrooms and concession stands will also receive makeovers and there will be new premium seating environments, a press area in the South end zone and improved in-stadium Wi-Fi.
The renovations are paused for 24 days during the fair and are expected to be completed by next year’s game.
“There’s a great deal of connection to continuing to have the game there at the Cotton Bowl,” Castiglione said. “Not the least is the recognition of a setting and atmosphere unlike any in college football and maybe all of sport. Very few events can compare. Yes, there are more modern stadiums. Yes, there are championship events and certain elements to navigate having a football game in the middle of a State Fair.
“However, this is something you can never experience, and those that have gone regularly for decades, or those that have had their first experience last year, want to continue to enjoy this year after year in the same type of setting, even with its imperfections.”
‘It’s been invaluable’
In the early 2000s when Del Conte was serving as senior associate athletic director at Arizona, Castiglione inquired about hiring him at OU.
Castiglione was in the market for a deputy athletic director and knew Del Conte’s potential as an up-and-comer in the industry. His impeccable knack for fundraising particularly stood out to Castiglione early on.
“The timing didn’t add up,” Del Conte said.
Castiglione says he recruited him “strategically” outside of one component. Arizona athletic director Jim Livengood was close friends with both men, which became an impediment during negotiations, so Del Conte ultimately decided to stay put.
Even before they met years earlier, Del Conte had admired Castiglione from afar as the gold standard of the job he wanted to hold. And as the relationship grew, he was proud to call him his mentor.
“Having someone of that ilk who took an interest in me,” Del Conte said, “and then the relationship grew. … We go about (the job) differently but at the end of the day, Joe is always about the student-athlete. He’s always about Oklahoma and I’ve learned how to be an athletic director and I’ve learned how to navigate this world because of our friendship.”
Del Conte has run nearly every career decision by Castiglione outside the choice of taking over the second-richest athletic program in the country.
Castiglione was critical in Del Conte securing his first AD job at Rice. Castiglione had spent a year there in sports promotions after college and urged Del Conte to take it.
Three years later, when TCU called, Del Conte phoned his friend. When Missouri and Texas A&M announced plans to leave the Big 12 for the SEC, the first message Castiglione received was from Del Conte about how he thought the Horned Frogs could best position themselves to get to the Big 12.
“It’s been invaluable,” Del Conte said of his relationship with Castiglione. “When TCU got in the Big 12, he was a huge part of that conversation, the main factor in leading me through how TCU can navigate their journey into the Big 12.”
Friendship like theirs in the business of college athletics is rare. The bond Castiglione and Del Conte have forged is also unique with a 10-year age gap between the two.
Del Conte used to marvel at how Castiglione carried himself as a leader at Missouri and OU. Sometimes Texas’ athletic director pauses to think about how their relationship has transformed from a mentorship to a brotherhood.
For Castiglione, not only is it special to have a friendship like it in the industry, but he also has a deep appreciation for what Del Conte has accomplished professionally. Outside of their relationship, Castiglione allows himself to take a step back and objectively observe the job Del Conte is doing in Austin.
Del Conte won the Sports Business Journal’s 2024 Athletic Director of the Year award and Texas has taken home the Directors’ Cup as the nation’s top-performing athletic department three of the last four years.
Castiglione remembers telling everyone he knew in the industry that if Del Conte ever received a job like the Texas job and they let him do what he’s capable of, big things would follow.
“Watch out,” OU’s athletic director would jokingly say.
“I will say this without equivocation, Chris Del Conte is the best fundraiser I’ve ever seen in college athletics, period,” Castiglione said. “I couldn’t tell you the second best, in terms of anybody close. … Chris is in a completely different universe. That guy is a fundraising savant, he’s brilliant and I’ve learned so much watching him.
“It’s astounding. Just look at what he’s accomplished there.”
‘Our friendship will persevere’
Castiglione meandered through a crowd of OU alumni and youth travel softball clubs from the Sooners’ side of Devon Park over to Texas’ for a friendly pregame spout with his buddy.
The two shared a hug and a few laughs before returning to their seats ahead of Game 2 of the Women’s College World Series finals between the rival programs. OU was one win away from an unprecedented fourth consecutive national title and the Longhorns were aiming to play spoiler and push the series to a Game 3.
“Yeah, that was no fun for us,” Del Conte said of the Sooners’ historic 8-4 win.
Outside the pregame civilities, like the annual Red River Rivalry football game, OKC was a no-talk zone for the competitors. It was that way when the schools met for the WCWS title series in 2022 and throughout other recent non-football championship races.
Despite what many fans may think, it’s not new for OU and Texas’ athletic directors to have a strong relationship. Former Sooners AD Donnie Duncan and former Longhorns AD DeLoss Dodds were close. Castiglione was fond of Dodds during their 15 overlapping years at the two institutions.
Over time there have been countless stories told of the vitriol between the two athletic departments. Castiglione says most rumors and perceptions would be debunked and that people would be stunned that most of those legends weren’t based on facts.
“In a rivalry situation, people might not be able to get their mind around it,” Castiglione said of OU’s relationship with Texas. “In the end, it’s been a positive outcome for both institutions when there are opportunities to work together for something that benefits both.
“And when you have a friendship on top of it, it just makes it even better.”
Del Conte added: “When it’s the day of the game, there’s no talk, period. We know what the game is, it doesn’t make a difference if it’s ping pong, marbles or football games. If OU is playing Texas or I’m playing Joe, we know that particular day. We both want to win, but at the end of the day, our friendship will persevere.”
Castiglione and Del Conte cherish the times they’ve spent together, including the unforgettable car ride to Mississippi. About every hour, a tire went flat and the two scratched their heads on the side of the road trying to figure out how to change a tire.
Neither knew how, so they were forced to call a nearby car dealership for help.
“Joe cannot change a tire to save his life,” Del Conte said. “That’s not part of his repertoire. I don’t think Joe knows exactly how to use a hammer, screwdriver or anything. That’s not his expertise, nor is it mine. So we both sat there, it was classic.”
For Castiglione, the trip meant more to him than a road trip filled with shenanigans. Del Conte, who was raised in an orphanage as his parents operated a group home for abused and neglected children in New Mexico, encouraged Castiglione to seek out his family history and appreciate his identity.
Seconds after reading the results of the tests, he phoned Del Conte with elation.
Seventy-four percent Italian through 23andMe. Eighty-six percent Italian through Ancestry.
They were both dumbfounded by the numbers as Castiglione was sure his Italian heritage was back multiple generations.
Now, when the topic is raised, the lifelong friends’ ruthless competitive nature is on full display.
“It has thrown him for a loop like you can’t believe,” Castiglione said. “Everywhere we go, he goes, ‘I’m Italian.’ I go, ‘But I’m more Italian than you are.’”
